all roads lead to money

On the heels of Valentines Day this week, one of the biggest flower holidays of the year, estimated to put over 2.6 BILLION dollars into the US economy, it seems time to start talking more openly about the environmental cost of doing nothing to disrupt the global flower trade. When staring down the stats on the carbon footprint, the plastic use, the toxic pesticide and herbicide use, there just isn’t room for a debate that things should change. And while Valentines day is a fine holiday, it is a triggering holiday for Tom and I because of what it represents and what it really costs. I’ve written about the environmental impact before and I’m sure I will again but what I feel compelled to write about in this moment is …money. Let’s talk about it … because at the heart of every single problem with the global floral trade and at the heart of every solution is money. This includes the environment, because all one needs to do when wondering why there isn’t more urgency about solving climate change … is to follow the money. Someone, something, somewhere is benefiting from not spending money to fix the environment. Every. Single. Time.

My new mantra: “ALL ROADS LEAD TO MONEY.” I dare anyone to prove me wrong.

When Tom decided to go all in on aquaponics, he was in a sea alone. He still is, to a large degree. Aquaponics isn’t new, but aquaponics in floriculture is very new. In fact, we might have the only aquaponics greenhouse growing floriculture exclusively … in the world. Literally. It’s innovative. It uses technology to grow flowers. It has many advantages over field grown flowers, both environmentally, economically, and in terms of plant health. It’s more than a cool way to grow flowers, it is a mission based option that could change and disrupt an industry that needs a major shift in innovation and sustainable practices. But it’s still new and there is a lot more to learn. How does a start up company that is breaking into new technological space refine and improve its technology? you guessed it … money. Research, expansion, scaling, trial and error, equipment, testing, labor … it all costs money. Because … ALL ROADS LEAD TO MONEY.

So here we are, about two years since buying a new farm because we won a huge grant to build an innovative aquaponics greenhouse for floriculture and we are seeking investment funding. We were admittedly naive about what was going to be an inevitable consequence of building our new greenhouse. We knew it was going to be a game changer, but perhaps didn’t realize just how costly it was going to be on the other side of actually building it. We hit the ground running and got plants growing. We got flowers. All kinds of flowers. We are still getting flowers. We are having some great success, and some head scratching problems. Is it nutrient related? Is it disease related? Can we test for it? How do we fix it? We have engaged with plant scientists, aquaculture specialists, floriculture academics and we absorb their guidance and make adjustments. Sometimes it’s successful, sometimes we’re not sure. Most of the time we are left wondering how to push through the challenges so that we are operating with production and profit at peak performance. Are we there yet? No. Can you think of any technological business that is working in a space where no one has paved the path before them, and they got there with no outside investment? Just pure revenue got them where they needed to be? If you do know of such a business, we’d love to talk to them. I predict crickets on that request. Why? Because start ups need money and technology development is expensive. Hell, even the US tax code allows agricultural businesses 7 years to claim a loss. Why? because it is widely assumed that NO ONE can hit the ground running in agriculture and zoom straight to profit without the benefit of time and money to get there. ALL ROADS LEAD TO MONEY.

And so our journey to additional funding is in full swing. And it has been the biggest learning experience of our lives. For better or worse, we are seeing the world in a much different way, and not necessarily for the better. I’m not going to sugar coat any of it. Seeking investment is an exercise in complete humility, shame, fear, anxiety and rage. And here is the down and dirty truth about it, both the grant side AND the private investor side.

Over the last 6 months (even longer actually) we have engaged or met in person nearly every single local, state and federal elected official that might have an impact on Maryland Agricultural laws and/or policy. We have amassed an advocacy based document that outlines every grant (federal and state) that our business “could” be eligible for and then traced back the impediments to actually getting funding as a “for profit” small business. We have talked to hundreds of mentors, business leaders, policy makers, grant agencies, academics and association CEO’s. We’ve picked the brains of other small and big business leaders in the floral industry, both in the United States and abroad. It has been a fulltime job. It has had moments of exhilaration and utter exhaustion both because of the hope of large scale change and the snails pace at which change is executed. It feels like we are “fighting the good fight,” and yet there are days when we look at each other and wonder what the hell difference any of this is making. I would love to be able to report better outcomes than what we’ve seen thus far but that wouldn’t be really honest. Here is the hard core, unedited truth:

ALL ROADS LEAD TO MONEY

Most of us know that this is true but often we don’t feel like we can speak it out loud. And why is that exactly? I am going to give you an example. Just last week, Tom and I were meeting with staff at a State Senators office. Two lovely women who were eager to hear from us and genuinely appeared to want to assist us in a few specific asks. What were the asks? One was that we are seeking a legislative fix to a land acquisition grant program administered by a state agency in Maryland called Marbidco. Marbidco is a great agency. They have many programs designed to help farmers with both services and funding. We have been the recipient of one of those grant programs and we are extremely grateful for it. There’s a caveat. While we were able to get access to a six figure land acquisition grant (which is the only reason we were able to acquire our 34 acre property), the legislation that authorizes the funding for that grant is written with a major flaw. A flaw so big that most people will never get to take advantage of it. How? The readers digest version is: IF you find a piece of land that checks all the easement and other criteria to be eligible for the grant you must 1) have an active contract on the land to be considered for the funds AND 2) you must wait 6-9 months to close on the real estate transaction.

Anyone see a problem here? How many non-familial real estate transactions can you think of that would be successful with a timing requirement like that? We were able to get the grant successfully executed in order to buy our farm, but I can assure you, it didn’t happen without a lot of gray hairs and advocacy on our own behalf. Letters, phone calls, with every person that we thought could help us. We were told over and over “so sorry, but nothing can be done about it.” If we had settled for that response, we would have lost the farm. We were told by the real estate agent that the sellers would not wait to close. Not one person appeared to do much but shrug their shoulders until we got to the chief of staff at our governors’ office. Within 3 hours of that phone call … miraculously … there was a work around presented to us by the agency director. Coincidence? we doubt it. Context is important here because 2 years later we are still trying to get that law re-written. We have told all of our state legislators about it, many of whom had no idea that the statutory language was so problematic.

Does a legislative fix now help our company? No. We have been funded. We aren’t seeking the change for us. We are seeking the change so that this incredible program (which is intended to make land more accessible to a new generation of farmers) is available to new farmers in the future. It doesn’t make us special or get us an award and we aren’t seeking that. What we want is for someone to see it and fix it and care about it. So as we sat in the Senators office and explained our story in more detail, the response we got from one of the staffers went something like this, “well I’m so glad to hear that you want to change this but not for your own business because the feeling I’m getting from that agency is ‘why are they still bringing this up? they got their money … they want more money?”

I sat there and could feel my blood pressure rising. I could have stayed silent but I knew if I had, it would have been a missed opportunity. It wasn’t the staffers fault. She was just relaying a message she had gotten from the Marbidco staff. This is what I said, “it is true that our business would see no direct financial benefit from a change to this legislation, but even if it could, what would be wrong with that? small farm businesses are trying to be profitable all over this country and it is really hard to do that without outside funding, which start up businesses seek all the time. There is no shame in a small business seeking funding, whether it be from grants, private equity or otherwise. To suggest that the legitimacy of our ask here is more valid because we aren’t “getting anything out of it” is seriously flawed logic and not ok. Seeking funding is not a shameful act, for our business any other small business.”

The mood in the room shifted but I just had to say it. It was the elephant in the room that we often feel but that is never spoken. The feeling is “Why can’t you make your business work from the revenue you generate? Why are you always wanting funding? Your business must not be working or must not be able to make money, or be profitable.” No one says that out loud but it feels like it is the undercurrent to every funding ask, both with grants and private equity.

It’s always about money. All roads lead back to money. Side step it all you want, but money either makes or breaks your business, money is at the heart of all business engagement, it comes between business relationships, family connections, world leaders. Platitudes aside … it is always about money. Someone, or some entity has it and they sit at the helm of decisions made about how to spend it and who gets it. The haves and the have nots. The government and the taxpayer. It has become more and more obvious to us as we navigate the grant and funding advocacy space that we have deep dived into. Money is really just a way to measure value. What do we value? Who gets to decide what to value? What do average people do about the inequities given in value?

And now over to the private equity side …. It is daunting to stick our toes into the world of private funding. Is it any better than the government grant shitshow? Not really. It has the potential to move faster but damn that comes at a price. We recently had a meeting with a investment group that has a website covered with their sustainability commitments and goals. Super … we thought. About half way through our pitch the CEO interrupted us “yeah … so I just don’t see a 10x return in 3 years here guys … I mean, we love sustainable projects but we are greedy capitalists and the return is always going to be more important to us.” WOW … there it was. I had to respect the honesty but it left us both a bit shell shocked. What I wish I would have said, but didn’t, is “perhaps you should stop greenwashing your website?” Because there is a whole lot of that going on out there y’all. It sounds great to say you’re into sustainability, but if you only like it if it produces a silicon valley ROI, then you aren’t being honest. We often feel like we are lowly peons after an investment pitch. A lot like shark tank, you are being judged and put through the ringer by the “haves” and we are clearly the “have nots.” The investors size you up and decide whether your business is worthy of their money. Mostly we get told no. And when you hear that over and over and over, it is easy to feel like shit. What makes the process even more demoralizing is that the numbers game in “investment speak” is based on a lot of projections, predictions, assumptions and other stuff that starts to feel like pure speculation. It’s as if you are in a competitive game with other “have nots” trying to make sure your speculations are better than the other guy. And maybe if your bullshit is more convincing, the “have” will give you some money, but not before they try to take most of your company. It’s the bribe you take, to be at the mercy of someone else’s vision. It leaves me wondering if it is even worth it at all. Isn’t that why we left conventional jobs? We were no longer at the mercy of someone else’s vision. The entire process has left us exhausted, demoralized and in our worst moments, feeling like we want to quit.

So yeah …. this is where things are at the moment and we have always maintained that talking honestly about the financial reality of running a small business, but especially an agricultural small business, is no joke. If you are a small scale flower farmer, and you are sincerely trying to make a living in farming (ie: no one else is paying the bills from an outside income) we see you. We are there too. We are fighting with all of tools we have at our disposal to find funds for our business but also to make changes in any way that we can. It’s slow, it’s frustrating and it’s more necessary now than ever. The planet can’t wait for new innovation for climate change, the economy must shift and disperse wealth more fairly, agriculture requires more than shrugged shoulders or empty “commitments” to farmers. It’s just not enough. The government and wealthy investors are not doing enough.

No small business, especially those that are trying to make an impact for the better, should feel an ounce of shame or embarrassment about asking for help in cold hard cash. If all roads lead to money then we need to seek more money and support one another in getting access to it where and when we can. There is plenty of money out there. There is plenty of money changing hands. It really comes back to the identification of what the “haves” decide is worthy of funding. Agricultural businesses are worthy of funding. Floriculture is worthy of funding. Sustainable projects are worthy of funding.

If ALL ROADS LEAD TO MONEY … then it’s time that small sustainable agriculture gets a fair share too.